"Where the Women are Strong" from Alan

Alan and Barbara have arrived in Oslo after a grueling trans-continental (Alan) and trans-Atlantic (Alan and Barbara) flight.

Alan flew across to New York in two planes without sufficient leg room. So when he arrived at the gate for the flight to Brussels, he was particularly downcast about Barbara's earlier failed attempt to upgrade them to Business class (rebuffed in January because, American Airlines insisted, the upgrades for the flight were already sold out). So as they went through the ticket gate, Alan suggested to the nice ticket-taker that he upgrade his cane-reliant mother to Business Class like a good man should. Amazingly, the ticket-taker suggested he ask at the check-in counter. So they took three steps to the side and asked. And, lo and behold, after many minutes and phone calls, Alan and Barbara got upgraded! Thank goodness!

Their Norwegian ancestors, with their likely grim view of life and its inevitable dark periods, would not have been surprised, therefore, to find that their good fortune in New York would be counter-balanced with bad luck in Brussels. Their arrival gate at the Brussels airport was apparently in Amsterdam (at least it felt like they walked all the way from Amsterdam). After a 30 minute walk (not joking) they arrived at a security checkpoint where they were determined to be risky types. Barbara's carry-on luggage was completely unpacked (by a woman who then re-packed it more efficiently than Barbara had; Barbara and Alan now consider the Flemish to be phlegm-ish and efficient) and Alan's boots were carried off for an extra x-ray by a man who no doubt suffered from the 15 hour odorizing Alan's feet had performed upon them. Released from suspician, Alan and Barbara continued the further two miles (slight exagerration) to their gate only to find that their flight to Oslo was "Afgelast," "Anullé," "CANCELLED"! A kindly woman took their boarding passes and disappeared for long enough for them to suspect that she was now taking a friend with her to Oslo (vacation destination of the cooler Flemish, no doubt), eventually returning with new boarding passes on a different airline, vouchers for two free drinks and a wheelchair for a very stiff Barbara.

They were met at the airplane door in Oslo by a strong looking Norwegian woman (Garrison Keilor now appears to Alan and Barbara to be a clear-eyed journalist). She loaded Barbara into the chair and scooted off to baggage claim, leaving Alan trailing in her dust. Once their baggage had been collected and piled onto a luggage cart, this woman drove Barbara with one hand and the luggage cart with the other and dashed off through the crowded airport barreling through some crowds, but dodging around most (that was where her strength really showed: in her ability to turn two wheeled vehicles simultaneously with one hand each without slowing down). She helped them purchase their train tickets to downtown Oslo and whisked them off to the platform.

Before she left them, Alan got this photo of two strong Norwegian women.

The women are strong indeed.